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As I began to think about what this section of the blog would cover, I got really overwhelmed thinking of the hundreds of topics all of us moms could talk about. But then I realized that it probably means nothing if you don’t know a little about my personal pregnancy and birth story. So, here it is!
My little love’s birth story is anything but straightforward. It was mostly controlled chaos, which I think is perfect, because that is sort of what life has been like with her since!
Pregnancy was, overall, relatively kind to me. I had some pretty bad food aversions and nausea in the first half and got a whopper of a sinus infection around 7 weeks that I thought might kill me, but I made it and most of the second trimester was a breeze. Really, even the third was pretty good aside from lightning crotch. If you don’t know what this is, pray now that you never find out. If you’re still interested as you continue to ponder the name, I promise I will do a post on it later. Suffice it to say, it’s not fun and made moments in my third trimester feel like absolute torture. However, even with all the little discomforts and with so much anticipation of meeting my little lady, I still dreaded labor and delivery.
My doctor, husband, and I decided to induce due to Polyhydramnios. If that term is as foreign to you as it was to me, then it means I had too much amniotic fluid. The little lady was having a hard time dropping into position for birth. Apparently floating around in all that space was just way too much fun for her. For the record, this meant my belly was ginormous. I thought it was just in my head, so I was relieved when my doctor confirmed that I wasn’t just imagining that my belly was huge…
Prior to receiving that diagnosis though, my doctor was concerned that I was big simply because I might have a BIG baby. I remember being terrified. Does that mean I had to birth a 10 lb + baby?! Or does that mean I had to have a C-section?! In all honesty, I was never super excited about childbirth. So to now be considering those two options? HA! Why did I get pregnant again?! Both sounded equally horrible to me. I cried the whole day before my ultrasound fearing what news I might get. Finding out it was fluid and that the baby seemed to be a little smaller than originally thought was welcome news.
A note here about reading things online. We made the decision to induce and I naturally spent the car ride home reading online discussion boards where Mom’s spend time heaping guilt onto other Moms about any and every decision they make about their baby. We induced and I don’t feel the least bit guilty about it. Our lady is healthy and happy and I’m glad we moved her out when we did cause it turns out she wasn’t able to do it herself.
So the big day came. Our hospital admits inducements late in the evening which meant we didn’t get the go ahead to go to the hospital until almost 11pm. When we got there, we found out they hadn’t been able to open a bed for me, but since I was there, they were going to start the admission process anyway in hopes a bed would open soon. So to a triage room we went. They started all my medications and contractions began. Well, that bed they had been hoping for never opened until noon the next day. So it was a long night, in a small room, with big contractions. The only bonus was that there was a McDonald’s in our hospital so I at least got something better than hospital food while I was waiting!
The next afternoon we were moved to a delivery room and I feel the need to take a sidebar here: If you are in Atlanta and have to deliver at Northside Atlanta, you will LOVE your delivery nursing staff. I have to make a huge shout out to those ladies. They are absolutely the most amazing women and made a complicated and emotional process so much better. Here’s why…
While they were working on getting my little lady to drop, they lost her heartbeat three times. Yes, three times. Each time they rushed the room and tried to get it back in the calmest and most cheerful demeanor they could. But each time you could feel the tension in the room amplify. It was scary and surreal. My doctor at that point gave me an option: It was either a C-section by choice now or possibly have an emergency one later. I very begrudgingly agreed. See, here is the thing… if you read anything about C-sections, they can seem like the very worst thing in the whole world. I had never had a surgery before. I was so scared and felt like I was going to “miss out” on the normal delivery process. I was sobbing like crazy almost all the way into the operating room. Looking back now, I wish someone had told me (which is why I am telling you) it was not even close to what I was fearing.
Aside from the worst dry mouth I have ever had in my entire life, it was really a relatively easy process and the moment that little lady (with very healthy lungs) was held up in front of me was, easily, the best moment ever. I’m going to talk more about the recovery process in a later post, but here are a couple of reasons why I thought this birth story was important:
- People make a big deal about birth plans. I didn’t have one. My birth plan was that I really wanted a natural birth and I was VERY welcoming to any pain meds that were available to me. (the more the better was my motto) The pain meds worked out, but that was about it. The problem I see with birth plans is that they set you up for having expectations about how things “should” go. Any time you have a “should” you have the potential for huge disappointment. Births are complicated enough without adding expectation in the mix. If there are things that are really important to you, by all means share them with your team, but don’t get wedded to anything and be prepared for it all to go out the window.
- C-Sections are not bad… like at all. I know, many women out there have bad experiences. I read about all of them online prior to delivering. And I read all the fear mongering about C-sections too. But there are bad experiences for natural births as well (trust me, I heard plenty of them as well). For some reason, there is this general sense that having C-sections makes for complicated and painful recoveries and that you didn’t “really deliver” your child. That is some BS right there. That was not my experience at all and I labored for 20 hours or so. I don’t feel like I missed out on anything. I grew and birthed an absolutely gorgeous baby girl and I feel nothing but proud of how I did it. In fact, I am now really happy I had a C-section and wouldn’t have wanted it any other way. All those ice packs for your hu-ha? Yeah, I didn’t need them. I think that’s pretty great! So, new Mama’s, it’s really ok if you end up with a C-section too. You will be fine and, most importantly, you will have delivered a beautiful new life. That is way more important than how they were delivered.
Did your birth story go as planned? What (positive) advice do you have for new Mama’s facing delivery for the first time? Comment below and share your thoughts!
Here are a couple of items I could not live without in the hospital:
- A Birthing Dress – I didn’t pack one of these and ended up having my Mom get me one from the hospital gift shop. Most useful item I had during my whole hospital stay. Hospital gowns are hot and uncomfortable, but functional for all the medical and nursing activities. These are the best of both worlds and I lived in it.
- Boppy Nursing Pillow – This was a lifesaver for so many reasons. It helped with feeding, propping myself up in bed, and could be used as a neck pillow too. Those hospital beds are anything but comfy so this thing managed to pull triple duty a lot.
- A Comfy Pair of Slippers – It’s chilly in hospitals and you’ll want to get up and walk when you can. Anything you can slip on without having to bend over is perfection.
- No-Slip Headbands – Kept my hair out of my face regardless of whether my hair was up or down. So glad I packed these!